YummY! Down on This

Archive for April, 2010

Remeber a few months ago when I mentioned that I had somehow went to the hospital and came home with a child.

Well, I still have him, he’s still human, and he’s still the cutest darn baby in the whole wide world.  (His gramma and I agree on that one.)

I’ve recently started occasionally giving him some “real” food.  Real in this instance being liquefied food that comes in little jars that babys are supposed to eat.

Thus far he’s eaten some rice cereal, some banana and some apple sauce.  Banana seems to be his favorite.

He eats pretty good for a child who can’t even sit up completely on his own yet.

He likes eating too. When he’s swallowed the last mouthful he’ll grab my hand and move the spoon into his mouth again, just like he does when I’m giving him a bottle.

And this last one is my favorite picture we have of him eating. I think the look on his face is so cute.

They fluttered into the store thirty minutes before closing time.  From the start they reminded me of a flock of birds.

As a group they circled the flower stems.  They made more than once circuit to make sure they didn’t miss anything.  There they were like vultures, circling the same patch of forest trying to make sure they didn’t miss a tasty morsel the first, second or third times around.

They stoped together and talked.  Chatter, twitter, squawk with laughter.  There they reminded me of seagulls landing on a beach, arguing over the crumbs of chips left behind by some earlier beach goer.

Then one of them stopped, tilted her head a little and looked at me with bright wet eyes.  She seperated from her flock and swooped towards me.

Now she is was a single bird of prey.  A hawk or an owl who has spotted a meal and is going down with talons out.  I was the rabbit, frozen in her shadow, wanting to run but knowing that she has seen me and even if I run my days are numbered.

She stops short in front of me, seeming to size me up before asking, “Where is the bathroom.”

“At the back and to the right,” I tell her, gesturing widely as if to shoo her away.

She flutters off, back to her flock and they twittered together a moment before swooping off again.  The flock migrated together to their watering hole.

While answering daily questions for my sparkteam’s spring challenge, I realized that I don’t actually DO much.

No, I take that back.  I do a lot.  I’m a new mom to a 5 month old son.  I’m a wife to an out of work husband.  I work a full time job, taking in extra hours any chance I get.

My job is very physical.  I climb up and down ladders.  I lift boxes.  I walk from one side of the store to the other and back again.  I log between 10,000 and 15,000 steps on an average 8 hour day.

Being a mom is very physical too.  I have a 14.9 pound bundle of joy who can’t even sit up on his own yet, most less actually WALK on his own.

But it seems that holding the baby seems to have taken up all of my non work time.  Its at home that I do NOTHING once I get home.  I maybe get on the computer, or watch a movie with the hubby, but I’ve not worked out since I started working.  I’ve not even gone for my walks around the neighborhood, which I was really starting to like and look forward to before I went back to work after my maternity leave.

I look at a lot of fitness magazines.  The first place I turn to is always the success stories.  Women losing massive amounts of weight and keeping it off for so very long.  Women whose stories help motivate other people.  People like me.

I want to be a success story one day.  I want someone to read about me and say, “if she can do it, then I can do it!

A couple of years ago there was a man who was around 400 pounds who declaired he was going to run the Boston Marathon.  It made a lot of people angry at him, but even more people supported him.

I was dissapointed to find that his blog is no longer up.  I thought I could look to it for inspiration.  I started thinking maybe I needed a goal.  Something more serious than to “lose weight.”

Now, I have no intentions of running the Boston marathon, and not just because Boston is too far away.  But there are local marathons, and marathons to fight cancer.

Now getting fit to run a marathon would be an odd choice for me.  I’ve never thought I wanted to be a runner.  But I just think I need SOMETHING more tangible to work towards.

Once upon a time I weighed 225 pounds.  Then I lost about 15 pounds and 2 pant sizes.

I was HAPPY to fit in a size 20.

Now I’ve gained all that weight back, plus some.  I can’t even fit in my size 22 jeans anymore.

Did I mention I can FEEL the fat on my back rolling back on itself on my back.

I used to look at the REALLY big women sometimes and tell myself, “I know I’m fat, but I’m never going to be THAT fat.”

Well guess what.  I think I’m that fat!

Things must change.

I’m so tired. So very, very tired.
I’m hungry, and have nothing to fix for lunch.
I’m thirsty and have no coffee.
I want to sit and whine all day, throw myself a pity party.

Instead….

THANKFUL THURSDAY (on friday)

1. Parker is healthy and growing like a weed!

2. WIC for letting me keep my baby fed.
3. Swagbucks and Gather for letting me earn gift cards for my time spent online.
4. The free magazine subscriptions I can get because of mycokerewards
5. Closing shifts mean I get to sleep in.
6. I’m off this weekend.
7.  I have a job.  (Cause ONE of us needs one)